Begin Again (Crimson Romance) Read online

  “Surprise!” Jacob said as he leaned his crutch against the chair and walked across Ryan’s living room. “My ankle is better. I think I’m able to drive now. My insurance company sent me a rental until my repairs are finished.”

  Ryan knew his friend was eager to get back to Illinois, to be back in his own house again. “Man, there’s no rush. You still have that cast on your arm. My home is your home.”

  Jacob shook his head. “I’ve stayed long enough, my friend. Time for me to hit the road.”

  Ryan saw his determined look and knew there was no changing his mind. “This time, please be careful.”

  Jacob saluted him, “Scout’s honor. I’ll even give you a call when I get back safely.”

  “That might mean something if you’d ever been a scout.”

  Jacob smiled.

  “Alright.” His mind was made up, no use trying to change it. “You want to stay for dinner and head out in the morning?”

  “No, I don’t want to drive in the rush-hour traffic.” Jacob walked toward the door and then turned. “Good luck with Maisie. She is sweet.”

  “Thanks. And you stay away from Kate. That woman is poison.”

  Jacob threw his head back and laughed. “Got it.”

  Ryan watched with a nervous eye as his best friend drove away slowly. He’d miss having him around, though it would be nice to get back his routine.

  • • •

  “Did you like the movie?” Cady asked Maisie as they left the dark theater.

  She tossed the half-empty bucket of popcorn and her empty cup in the trash. “Yeah. Did you?”

  “A movie about friends and shoes? Of course!”

  Cady jiggled her keys when they got to the parking lot.

  Maisie looked over at her sister. “I’m glad you talked me into coming. It’s been a long time since we had a sister date.”

  Cady unlocked the car and smiled, “Too long, honey. We need to make this a regular thing.”

  “So, I heard from Dad.” She paused to fasten her seatbelt. “Thanks for not telling them about Ryan.”

  Cady grinned, “There’s nothing to tell is there?”

  Maisie looked out her window. “I like him. We’re great as friends.”

  “Mmm-hmm.”

  “I mean, we have gotten closer, and he makes me happy when I see him.” She paused. “It’s when I’m away from him that I have my doubts.”

  Cady put on her turn signal and turned onto their street. “What do you mean?”

  Maisie pretended to examine her fingernails. “I don’t know. I still have sadness in my heart. A sadness that I’m afraid will never disappear completely.”

  Cady reached over and put her hand on Maisie’s arm. “It will. I promise.”

  She wanted to change the subject, and the only thing she could think of was the fact that she’d almost saved enough to start looking for her own place. “I’m thinking of going house hunting this weekend. I only need about a thousand more and I’ll have enough for a nice down payment.”

  “If you’re ready, I think it’s a good idea.” She paused to park the car. “As much as I love having you live with me, I understand you wanting your own space.”

  Wow, she’d actually thought her sister would argue about her wanting to move. Maybe I’m not the only one who needs privacy. “Thanks for understanding. I’m sure you and Sam are ready to have your house back to yourselves.” Maisie reached for the door handle.

  Cady reached over and put her hand on her arm. “Wait. I have something to tell you. I was going to tell you earlier, but I chickened out.”

  Maisie raised an eyebrow. “What is it?” Not the therapy talk again.

  Cady put her hands in her lap and took a deep breath. “I’m pregnant.”

  Maisie’s mouth fell open. Of all things, she didn’t expect to hear that. Her sister and Sam had said they never wanted to have kids, that they weren’t the parenting type. So it was surprise and not envy that left her speechless. Well, maybe a teeny-tiny bit of envy.

  Cady’s lower lip trembled. “I’m sorry. I know it’s unfair.”

  Maisie hugged her sister. “No Cade, I’m okay. Just surprised, that’s all.”

  Cady looked at her with watery eyes. “It wasn’t planned, but we’re happy about it now that the shock has worn off.”

  Maisie smiled and wiped the single tear that had slid down her sister’s cheek. “Well then, I’m happy, too.”

  Cady smiled. “Really? Because I want you to be, so much.”

  Maisie nodded. She felt genuinely happy for her sister. “Yes. How far along are you?”

  Cady placed a hand over her stomach. “Just six weeks. You are the first person to find out. Mom and Dad don’t even know.”

  “You don’t have to worry about my feelings. This is your life, and it has nothing to do with my loss.”

  Cady nodded. “I think you’re on a good start to healing.”

  Maisie hoped with all her broken heart that she was right.

  CHAPTER 8

  “He’ll be just fine. Once the antibiotics are finished, I’d like to see him again for a follow-up next week. You can schedule your appointment when you check out,” Ryan told the guinea pig’s owner.

  The woman zipped up the carrier her pet was snuggled inside of. “Thank you so much.”

  She exited the room, and Ryan went over to the stainless steel sink to wash his hands. As he was getting a paper towel, there was a knock at the door.

  He turned to look, “Yes, Alice?”

  “I’m afraid that the part-time lady you were thinking of hiring has just taken another job offer. We’re back to square one, and I only have one week left before we leave for Arizona.”

  Ryan sighed. “Call the temp agency. We may have to try our luck there.”

  “Okay, boss,” Alice said with an apologetic look.

  • • •

  Maisie slipped on her blue jeans and an ivory lace shirt. She’d tossed and turned all night, but this time it wasn’t from nightmares. This morning it was clear what she wanted to do. She walked upstairs to grab a cereal bar and coffee then headed out the door. After putting her car into drive, she gripped the steering wheel tighter. Hopefully Ryan would think it was a great idea for her to be his new assistant, because she’d finally decided it was what she wanted.

  She devoured her breakfast, being careful not to get anything on the shirt she had borrowed from her sister. By the time she pulled up to the clinic, her heart was racing and her palms were sweaty. Here goes nothing. She opened her car door and walked up to the small building that could be her new place of employment.

  When she stepped inside on the tile floor, she didn’t expect to see the cute twenty-something girl with brown ringlets and bright red lipstick sitting behind the desk.

  “Hello, you can sign in right here,” the girl said as she pointed to the paper in front of her.

  Maisie couldn’t speak. Her heart sank. She was too late.

  The girl stood up and looked down at the floor around Maisie’s legs. “Did you bring your pet in or picking one up?”

  Maisie shook her head. Finally finding her voice, she managed to squeak out, “I’m here to see Ryan.”

  The girl eyed her as if sizing her up. “Oh, you mean Doctor Hottie? He’s in with a stray baby owl. Cutest little thing … ”

  Maisie stared at her, not listening to what she was saying. All she’d heard was Doctor Hottie, then the rest was just white noise.

  “Never mind,” Maisie whispered and turned to leave.

  “Wait, did you want to make an appointment?”

  Maisie turned to look at the brunette bombshell and shook her head. She pushed the exit door open and swallowed oxygen as if she’d been stuck in an airless tunnel.

>   She knew she had feelings for Ryan and cared about him, but it wasn’t until the girl behind the desk had called him “Hottie” that she realized how deep those feelings had become. Feeling stupid, tears stung her eyes as she pulled her car away from her dream job and any chance of a future with Ryan.

  • • •

  Ryan came out of the exam room to check on the temp. She was a little immature for his taste, but maybe she’d be okay once Alice finished training her. He walked over to the computer to find her filing her nails. Was he paying her for this?

  When she didn’t say anything, he cleared his throat. “Any messages?”

  Tiffany smiled. “None. How am I doing?” She batted her fake eyelashes like something was in her eye.

  Ryan pointed to his own eye. “You okay there?”

  She frowned. “Yes.”

  Ryan laughed to himself. He wasn’t an idiot. She was attracted to him. She would have been the type of girl he might have dated back in Illinois, but now he only had eyes for Maisie. No woman would ever compare.

  • • •

  After changing back into her plain T-shirt, Maisie drove to the diner, disappointed. Good thing she hadn’t given Ginger her notice. She had been about to make a life-changing decision, and it had backfired. The gray feeling of the drizzling rain matched her mood perfectly.

  Once they were caught up on customers, she dragged Lola to the back to tell her what happened at Ryan’s clinic.

  “Did you ask him about it?” Lola asked in disbelief.

  Maisie bit her lip. “Not exactly. What would I say? Oh Ryan, I know you already hired some gorgeous girl that apparently likes you, but I want the job. Oh, and I want you, too.”

  Lola shrugged. “Yeah, why not?”

  Maisie let out a groan. “Because I could never ever say those words to him!”

  Lola took the salad dressing out of the fridge. “I thought you were supposed to be honest in relationships.”

  “We’re not in a relationship. We’re … we’re … ”

  Lola giggled. “Friends, remember? At least that’s what you keep saying.”

  Maisie groaned. “When he comes in, will you take care of him? I don’t think I can face him right now.

  Lola chomped on her gum and narrowed her eyes as if deep in thought. “I will, but he’s not going to like it. You know, I’ve had the apple pie here, and it’s not that good.”

  Lola walked away, leaving her even more confused.

  When Ryan walked inside the diner right on schedule, he looked tired but still handsome. Always handsome. She had to face him.

  • • •

  Ryan couldn’t remember a day he felt so exhausted. He took a deep breath and put a smile on his face for Maisie. She had enough to deal with and didn’t need to worry about him.

  “So did you find someone to replace Alice yet?” Maisie asked later, as they walked out of the diner together.

  The rain was like a fine mist coating them with tiny dots of water.

  “I did.”

  Maisie nodded. “That’s good.”

  He returned her nod. “Yeah.”

  They both stood at Maisie’s car, their clothes getting damp from the misty rain.

  “Jacob went back home.”

  Maisie looked up at him. “He did?”

  Her hair looked as if it had a layer of shiny glass over it. He lifted his hand and smoothed the water into her hair, turning it a deeper shade of red.

  Maisie bit her lip and looked up at him. “My sister’s pregnant.”

  “She is?” That must be hard for you.

  She nodded and stepped closer to him, her green eyes locked with his.

  He didn’t know what was going on between them, but he ached to kiss her full, pink lips. Unable to control his longing, his hand cupped her wet face and he bent down to kiss her. His heart soared when Maisie returned the kiss, then fell when she pulled away like she’d made a mistake.

  “I should go.”

  He swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat and watched her run away from him once again.

  • • •

  Maisie drove home with trembling hands. Ryan’s kiss was the most perfect kiss she had ever experienced and that scared her. It was as if it reached all the way to her soul. Guilt took over her emotions once again. Luke was in heaven. Did he see her kissing Ryan? Did he know she liked it? Why hadn’t she died in that tornado with her family? She turned the windshield wipers on faster. The rhythmic noise of the wipers put her in a trance.

  After she took her extra hot shower, she put on her pajamas and curled up on the sofa. She tried to get into the sitcom playing before her, but her mind kept wandering back to Ryan’s new assistant. Had his smile in the diner tonight been for her or the new girl? What was happening? Ryan wasn’t even hers to get jealous about. She gave up on TV and got Boots and Lucky out of their cages. Watching them scurry around the bathroom floor took her mind off Ryan for a few minutes.

  Her phone rang, so she scooped up her pets and placed them back in their cages.

  “Hello?” she asked, out of breath.

  “Maisie, are you okay?” Ryan asked.

  She sat down on her bed. “Yeah, I was just playing with Lucky and Boots.”

  Ryan laughed. “About earlier … ”

  She cut him off. “Don’t … ”

  He interrupted before she could finish, “Okay.” He paused. “It’s supposed to be nice tomorrow. Do you want to do something?”

  Of course I do! “Like what?”

  “Go to the zoo?”

  She hadn’t been to the zoo since she was a teenager. Ryan was just a big, overgrown kid, which is probably what made him fun to be around. “Sure, okay.”

  “Good, I’ll pick you up at 10.”

  “Okay. Goodnight.” Maisie disconnected. What was this dance they were dancing? She knew she should be grateful for Ryan’s friendship, but if he started dating someone, it might be too painful for her to watch.

  • • •

  Maisie sat on the porch while waiting for Ryan to pick her up. She was so excited about spending the Saturday with him that she’d woken up two hours early. Those extra hours were spent on deciding what to wear and how to fix her hair. She’d settled on a white eyelet sundress and sandals. Multicolored bangle bracelets draped her arm, and she’d pulled up the sides of her hair with bobby pins.

  As she sat on the bench outside, she noticed that the purple clematis vine next to the porch was starting to bloom. Birds sang and chirped all around her, making her feel happy. She was going to try to enjoy the day without any negative thoughts. Maisie closed her eyes. Out you go, negative energy.

  When Ryan’s SUV pulled up to her sister’s house, she couldn’t help but grin. She hopped up from the bench. Excited, she opened the door and climbed inside. Ryan was in khaki shorts and a pink T-shirt. There were very few guys that could pull off wearing pink, and Ryan was one of them.

  Ryan handed her a magenta peony bloom. “From my yard. You look pretty.”

  She took the big puffball of a flower from him and held the saccharine scent up to her nose. She ran her fingers over the silky petals of the peony. “Thanks. You look nice, too.” Was this a date? He did give her a flower. Don’t get your hopes up.

  • • •

  Ryan paid for their tickets, and they walked through the tall zoo gate. “So what animal do you want to see first?”

  Maisie eyed the water fountain with stone animals all around it. The water sprayed parts of the statues, making some appear darker than others. “I don’t care. How about you? You’re the animal expert.”

  He tilted his head back and laughed.

  She loved it when he did that. “Why don’t we start with your favorite?”

 
His expression reminded her of a child trying to decide which toy he wanted in a store filled with toys. “It’s hard to choose a favorite, but I guess it’d be a close tie between the red pandas and the meerkats.”

  Maisie raised an eyebrow. “I’ve heard of meerkats, but a red panda?”

  Ryan nodded and took a hold of her hand. “Come on, I’ll show you.”

  His hand fit perfectly with hers, like it was made for her to hold. The zoo obviously took pride in the hundreds of mature plant and flower species that lined the blacktop path through the exhibits. The many colors burst off the dark path and the clear sky.

  When they reached the red panda exhibit, Ryan pointed to a couple of reddish-brown cubs playing in the corner under a tree. “Aren’t they cute?” His hand was still intertwined with hers.

  “Yeah, they are. They remind me of raccoons.” She pointed to a larger one who was lounging. “Look! That one is licking its fur like a cat!”

  Ryan turned to her. “There’s something I need to get off my mind before I can enjoy the rest of the day.”

  She looked at him with a questioning glance. “What?”

  “This.” He bent down and put his mouth over hers. The rest of the world faded away, and they stood alone. Except for the few hundred animals.

  • • •

  The rest of the zoo visit was a blur. After the kiss, she hadn’t been able to concentrate on much else. So when he pulled up to her sister’s house to drop her off, Maisie wasn’t sure what to say.

  Ryan tuned the SUV off and removed his seatbelt. “Did you enjoy the zoo?”

  Among other things. “Yeah. You?”

  He leaned toward her. “One of the best days I’ve ever had. Maisie, I want to date you. What do you say to that?”

  She swallowed. “What about your assistant?”

  He looked at her confusedly. “Alice?”

  Maisie tried to moisten her lips but her mouth had gone dry. Was he playing dumb with her? “No, your new assistant.”

  He narrowed his eyes. “Harper?”

  She nodded. “Yeah.”

  Ryan frowned. “I’m not following. What does he have to do with us dating?”

  Her heart skipped a beat. “He?” Now she was confused.